Back then when I was kid, we (one family) used to travel a lot. When I said travelling, it doesn't necessarily means outside the nation or the country, it doesn't necessarily means going by car or any types of vehicles to somewhere really far. Going somewhere to other places apart from home is what I called travelling. Discovering new things, getting to meet and see new people most likely strangers, no matter where in the world it is even it is just two miles away from home. As long as you I got that 'feeling' of travelling, thats what matter most. I don't know I always have this one feeling of I just know that I am in the travelling mood somekind of things.
As times goes by, we tend to have less and less travelling's family time (sort of). Especially like in this year because of mum's state of health we weren't be able to like went back to our hometown during Raya and such. And by including whole siblings of mine are in their school's holidays period so the time that we spent most likely whole day at home playing psp sitting infront of the laptop for the whole day, watching movies, nonstop changing tv channels and etc seems just like most longest unproductive day ever that we have spent in out entire lives.
And that one day when younger sister of mine keep mentioning of how we should stopping by somewhere since were going to Johor for relative's wedding and mum have been so much better to go somewhere far that requires long journey. I just shoot up and automatically said No. She stared at me blankly might wanting to ask why but she didn't and remained silent. So I told her that we're not in a state of good financial to just go somewhere chillin' ourselves since its still is requires money to just even filled up the car's fuel tank. And also abah seems to struggle more with his work nowadays that I made myself clear of my points. Its not that Im saying to her that we will never be able to travel again like we always did, but I'm saying that its just not today nor tomorrow. Not in the meantime. And that I also told her not to differentiate with anyone close to her, because I thought she might think and see how her friends having a family vacation together and all those good story time goes on.
She kept mentioning it few times after that, questioning about the same thing. Brought up the same idea. Until I find it hard to still keep to my defense, nonetheless I still said no. And she always end up crying everytime we have to argue about this matter that I just don't get it why is it so hard for her to understand the situation as of now. Or maybe I am the one who failed to get what she really meant. That evening when I was lying on the couch stared blankly at the fan, mum came up to me and just smiled. I didnt know what was the smile for and I just immediately said that sometimes I just didn't know where and how to highlight the situation that we were facing. Mum went slowly by saying that she got that, she got what am I trying to do. But being in the situation doesn't need me to come from upset and anger when I'm holding to my defense. I said how come, she can't freaking get it. Mum said thats why, she can't freaking get it that I came from the space that I want her to just get what I got and changing her stand and mind as of now, she has been through her own experienced of family time and now she missed that and sometimes people just want you to listen to them, hear what shes actually trying to convey. And be in the situation doesn't need you to act upon it no matter whats the reason, you always have a choice to choose of how to act and behave.
I guess I just failed in reading between the lines
The same evening mum asked me to go and buy 'roti banyak sayur kesayangan nenek' of mine (read: subway). Thats just the way my nenek always called it since she barely forgot to pronounce subway. She once used to ask our babu in our house area wherther he sells roti banyak sayur or not, poor babu that he must have went home and search for it since after that hes being invisible for like three days or so. Anyway that evening I am being too lazy ass to just go out just by looking at the weather, so I asked another younger sister of mine to teman me. And on our way home after passing by the ticket's parking machine, I accidently hit this one big and shallow hole when I am about to take the left turn. I am not really sure whether it is a hole but it looks like some kind of tembok besar dan rendah yang bila kereta lalu kau tak mampu agak terdapat tembok di situ eh sedar sedar dah tersekat simpul mati. Mati akal.
It was quite funny at first because half an hour after that another car got stucked at the same spot but oh hey looks theres just so many people came to help while theres no one stop by at ours. Did I mentioned that our car's tyre got leaked and flat and we were stucked at the side of the road having no credits in our phone hanya mengharapkan whatsapp itupun line celcom bolok nyawa nyawa ikan keli with raining cat and dogs outside and oh another great news! Car's fuel tank was left about 7km more, what a death note.
I took the umbrella and got out of the car went back of the car to look for extra tyre and there it is. We were like clapping happily founding the extra tyre until we realized one thing, now how to change this. I kept looking for the guided booklet or something seriously theres none found and my sister went like 'haven't you learned how to change tyre at your driving school?'
I just love trying out new things on my own that I even thinking of getting the tyre out by myself. Then after whatsapp-ed my brother, mum called and I asked her if she know how to change tyre. I can do it, just gimme the instructions. She said it might be quite hard and asked me to wait for my brother that I went I don't think that would help. He didn't know how to change tyre does he?
Anyway to cut the story short, after almost two hours of waiting. Calling coming in and out by mum and dad, waiting more and more for brother to came. Having to endure this craving to not eat nenek's subway it was just too hard its raining heavily outside theres no way to go and stomache just got to do its grumbling sound at the exact time. Here comes one van stopping by behind us and this one kind hearted uncle came and asked of what happened. And I said we just need to change the tyre. He went straight to the back of the car and get the spare tyre out, he's also getting help from his son. Im guessing his son was just around eleventh or twelve years old. I gave his son some money that I just passed by to his hand when he got back into his van, his quite shocked at first but I said thats okay thankyou for helping out and he just smiled. I am about to give that to the uncle but I am afraid that he might refuse to take it. All in all, money isn't worth anything compared to what they did.
After all those chaotic but glad to have one moment, mum called again and asked us to pack up our stuff since we're going to Johor on the next day and we have to make move that night. Instead of standing up again and argue, I packed up my stuff and do what im supposed to do. I guess its not that bad to just be in the moment and cherish it no matter whats the circumstances youre having.
Went back scroll up facebook and found this, thats my mum.
We stayed in Melaka before going to Johor the next day and I forced myself to wake up early in the morning after performing my subuh prayer that day. Went out and found out how soothing the blue sky is. Soothing blue sky is always soothing.
"And if you count the blessings of Allah, never will you be able to count them"
[Ibrahim; 34]
I saw KK been busy with her Deepavali's celebration preparation on facebook.
Happy Deepavali babe.
I need to practice how to change tyre.